the motions, the little delays

the motions, the little delays is the most biographical piece I have ever written. It was composed shortly after the death of a very close friend of mine, detailing the emotions I felt trying to cope with grief and continuing to work a menial job at a casino, dealing craps, while attempting to mourn off the clock. There are many components of this inspiration within the piece—the motor is a metaphor for the mechanical way I was going through the motions of my day-to-day life, numb and isolated due to grief and the nocturnal hours I kept. The pitches and intervals within the piece are based on craps payout ratios and odds built into the game. The most overt examples of this inspiration are the dice tosses that continue throughout the piece. Each system within the notation is based on a different number call, but it’s not gamified (the numbers on the dice when tossed do not matter). It is a spiritual successor to a piece I wrote last summer for Brightwork Ensemble called polarité, sans the flute and violin. The name of the piece is a reference to the slight pauses one may take before performing an action when they become overwhelmed with emotion for a moment, something the musicians embody in between each sound object they play.